Even though s3xual addictions, such a p0rn addiction, are becoming more and more accepted as real problems, not just convenient excuses for lascivious behavior, people suffering from them still feel massive amounts of shame.
That shame often fuels compulsive s3xual needs, and that same shame also often stands in the way of a person getting p0rnography addiction help.
Shame is at the core of recovering from a p0rn addiction; treatment addresses both the shame driving the addiction as well as the shame of having the addiction.
So What If I Look At Porn?
Everyone Does! Of all search engine requests, 25 percent are p0rn-related. Of all Internet downloads, 35 percent are p0rnographic. In the United States, Internet p0rn is estimated to be at least an $8 billion a year business. It’s perfectly clear: People like p0rn. But not all of these p0rn viewers are addicted to s3x or need p0rn addiction therapy. But some do, and the proliferation of p0rn addiction recovery programs like Neulia.com attests to the fact that this is a very real problem for many people. Because p0rn use is so widespread, many men deny that they have a problem: “Every guy I know looks at p0rn” or “I can stop anytime I want.” “Just because I like s3x, doesn’t mean I’m a s3x addict.” For some men, that all may be true. For others, though, the truth is that men with a true s3xual addiction can’t stop, and their addiction interferes with their relationships, marriages, s3xual performance, and jobs. What stops many men from seeking p0rnography addiction help is the shame of using p0rn as well as the shame of being unable to stop by themselves. The reality is that most men with a p0rn addiction issue need outside help.
The Blame And Shame Game
Lots of guys addicted to p0rn blame other people or situations in their lives: “I have a tough job with a lot of stress and need to let off steam.” “If my wife or girlfriend wanted more s3x, maybe I wouldn’t need to look at p0rn.” “The p0rn sites have me hooked, so I keep coming back for more.”
Reality check: If p0rnography use is interfering with your life, no one else is to blame but you. The first step toward p0rn addiction recovery is to take responsibility for your own actions. Blaming others is simply a diversion from the shame a p0rn addict feels.
Porn addicts use the s3xy videos and images (and subsequent physical release throughmasturbation) to cope with uncomfortable feelings such as inadequacy, loneliness, boredom, and, of course, shame. After p0rn use, shame sets in, the cycle starts all over again, and the individual uses p0rn again and again and again.
This cycle is extremely difficult to stop by yourself. Before they even realize it, many men are addicted.
How to stop p0rn addiction typically involves first recognizing that you can’t fix this on your own. Admitting that uncomfortable truth opens the door to seeking p0rn addiction recovery.
Once you acknowledge that you need p0rn addiction treatment and you seek that help, you can learn techniques to break the cycle of your compulsive behaviors. As you do that, you can begin to deal with the underlying shame.
Many men who go through p0rn addiction recovery programs see their lives change in ways that lead to improved intimate relationships, increased job accomplishments, and eventual freedom from the debilitating effects of living with shame.